I said I wanted to READ…not BLEED.

Open Letter to the creator of PVC Book Covers/Dust Jackets:

Dear Inventor:

I’m writing on behalf of my injured fingers, three of which sustained grave wounds this weekend as I attempted to read a book with one of those new-fangled plastic-paper covers.  Don’t feign ignorance, you know what I’m talking about!  PVC plastic has no business masquerading as paper, especially when it comes to covers of paperback books.  I thought PVC had something to do with pipes!

I understand that libraries are just trying to preserve their books, but I ask you, at what cost?!  Would they prefer a blood-stained copy of Julie and Julia to a slightly creased copy?  I almost took a scissor to my book to round the edges of doom but was afraid a heavy fine would be levied against me.

I have a $50 deductible at the ER and don’t relish the doctor telling me I need three stitches* in my finger all because of a book.  Isn’t reading supposed to be a safe and relatively inexpensive hobby?

Best (though bloody) wishes,


Book, Line, and Sinker

*A bit of hyperbole is being employed here.  I didn’t really need stitches but they added a bit of flair to my story!  Sorry for any confusion.

22 responses to “I said I wanted to READ…not BLEED.

  1. Oh good, I can use this as yet another way of rationalizing why I have to buy all my books.

    Sorry about your poor bloody fingers, though. 😦

  2. LOL

    I know exactly what you mean!!!

  3. Gee…and I thought my paper cuts were bad. The libraries out by me don’t use covers. I guess I should be happy about that.

  4. Wow. You really needed stitches? YIKES! Feel better!

  5. The bacon bandaids sound cool!

  6. What? You had to get 3 stitches because you cut your hand on a book cover? I’m not even sure what the jackets you’re talking about look like. I guess I need to make a trip to the library.

  7. I’m sorry to hear that the “edges of doom” injured you so badly, but your pain gave me a laugh. Thanks (and sorry)!

  8. I’m with Softdrink about having another reason to buy books. I’m sorry about your fingers.

  9. Oh my! This sounds like a papercut’s very evil, twisted cousin. Feel better soon!

  10. Love the letter!

    I actually hate any cover on a book. I remove them immediately. However, the ones at the library are usually taped on and I’ve avoided those ones for years.

  11. Papercuts are so 20th Century.

    Perhaps it was a special feature of the edition that allows you to dice ingredients while reading?

    I guess it would have been more appropriate if it were a copy of something like The Dangerous Book for Boys.

  12. I have not seen these types of books before. wow. I’ll have to keep an eye out and steer clear…they sound dangerous.

  13. LOL! I hope your fingers get better soon.

  14. I really have no idea what you’re talking about here.

    Does this mean I’m not utilizing my library well enough?

  15. ROFL. So sorry to hear about your war wound, but I did get a much needed laugh – thanks!

  16. I guess I’m going to have to stick with the hardcovers at the library!

  17. I’ve not seen these types of covers but I will beware! If I am forced to read a book with this type of cover, I will wear protective gloves!

  18. My library is apparently behind the times — Thank Goodness!! Yikes! I’ll buy some of those gloves that you can’t cut through if I ever get one of the me. PVC is really sharp (as you now know).

  19. Hi there! Thanks for noticing my absence. I wish I had some exciting story other than getting busy with life. Spent a week vacationing in DC in August and then went back to grad school last month. Now I have to focus my writing skills on the 4 papers I have due between now and December…. Hmmm…blogging…productive procrastination? I’ll have to think about that one 🙂

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